Friday, September 18

A word about my oldest....

I was thinking about my six year old all morning as I drove my two youngest from doctor appointment to doctor appointment.

She makes my job as a mother so easy. She learns easily, enjoys school, and is just generally a good kid. She shows a lot of similarities to me when I was a young girl. I was a people pleaser. I loved school, and it came easily as well.

But she has something I didn't. She has an amazing sense of compassion. I mean, I was a nice kid. I was mostly respectful of others' feelings. But Caroline has an innate sense of compassion. She thinks of things I wouldn't, even now as an adult. Could it be because she has lived most of her life with a brother with special needs? Maybe. Could it be that God made her this way simply because? More likely.

This morning, while I was in the shower, Caroline realized her brother was awake. She helped Will carry his bank downstairs (his newest obsession). She knows that he loves money and loves to put money into his bank to watch it go down into the bottom. When I got out of the shower, she says,

"Mom, I hope you don't mind, but I had a quarter left over from my hot lunch money the other day, and I gave it to Will to put in his bank." Meanwhile, she also heard her sister get up. She proceeded to get her out of bed and make Norah breakfast. I was struck by her innocent thoughtfulness this morning.

Sometimes, when I have a moment to stop and think, I realize that the easiest child I have been given to parent presents me with the greatest challenge. It would be easy to continue status quo with her while I address other challenges in our household. However, I need to be there for her, to teach her that it is okay to be a be silly for no reason at all. That it is okay to make mistakes....and that we love her just as she is. That she doesn't always have to be the good one, the well behaved one, and the responsible one.

I hope someday she realizes how lucky her dad and I feel to have her as our daughter.


  1. Yeah, we feel really blessed that we get to be her mother and father in law...Just kidding...sort of...

  2. She is definitely a very sweet kid Heather. I am sorry you guys have been sick. I think about you guys all the time and we miss you! We will be seeing you pretty soon though, Patrick's breathing issues he was having this summer are not getting better so we are going to be doing a weeks worth of testing through aero digestive unit, I will let you know as soon as we get dates. The only good part is that we get to see you guys!
    Love, jen
    Give everyone a big hug from us!

  3. Heather,
    Not sure if you've done this yet or not but I learned alot about being a sib of someone with special needs when I read "Special Siblings" I can't remember the author right now. I read it as an adult and it helped me to realized why I am like I am (in some ways). I think it would be very useful for parents of young kids with special needs.
    -Mariah Kroger